Advertisement
The World’s Worst Bitcoin Heist…Or Was It?
If you think about it, it actually takes quite a bit of talent to be the worst at something. But over the past week, social media has been ablaze reporting on the five-year anniversary of ‘the worst heist of all time’.
So I decided to investigate this claim and see if it truly lives up to its title.
Thieves get apprehended by the cops all the time — simply failing to break into a vault is hardly a disgrace. It’s hard work. Just look how long and convoluted Ocean’s Eleven is. (So complex, in fact, they deemed it necessary to create a trilogy).
But to be the worst? There’s a few more ingredients thrown in the recipe.
The thieves have to make it past the guards, the laser tripwires, the alarm codes. In short – they have to be successful. Kinda.
To be the worst heist of all time, you need to do everything right bar one, rather important thing…know what you’re stealing.
And that’s what supposedly happened to a Memphis convenience store, BitKing, five years ago.
Ocean’s 2021: A Bitcoin ATM Story
The story first hit social media in 2021 when the company’s owner posted a thread to Reddit with an eye-catching title:
‘Our ATM was stolen and found, luckily no Bitcoins were taken!’.
The post raised a hilarious premise – a group of organised criminals meticulously plotting a genius heist. After hearing about Bitcoin’s rising value on the news (remember, this was the peak of the 2021 bull market), they landed on a perfect target to make them millionaires: BTC.
Advertisement
After pulling off the heist of a lifetime, they regrouped in the getaway car to rifle through their spoils. Crowbar at the ready, they crack into the Bitcoin ATM, licking their lips at their newfound fortune — thanks to the hundred of Bit Coins no doubt inside.
Then, imagine, the dismay on their faces as the machine’s interior reveals no such coins. Instead, all they have is a hunk of scrap metal and some spare computer parts.
Disgusted, they abandoned the ATM in a park down the road and were never heard of again.
Never Let the Truth Get in the Way of a Good Story
Okay, I’m going to own up to something. The story above has been a touch exaggerated.
The social media post went viral back in the day and has since taken on a life of its own. Apparently, the thieves were on record saying they were ‘trying to get the coins out’ in a hilarious twist of incompetence.
In reality, there’s no source that proves this quote is real.
Additionally, people who are robbing Bitcoin ATMs are probably doing so for the cash inside. Because ultimately, these machines still take fiat currency — just like any other ATM.
What is interesting is that the thieves above didn’t get any cash regardless, because earlier that night, the owner decided to empty the ATM due to an influx of suspicious transaction activity.
Bitcoin ATMs Are Actually a Tasty Target for Criminals
The idea of breaking into a Bitcoin ATM, only to find a bunch of 1s and 0s is pretty comical — but in reality, it’s a relatively common occurrence.
Usually, robbers do have a bit of sense about them and are looking to nab the cash from inside.
But this may not always be the case. A news report from Silicon Valley displayed footage of several men breaking into a convenience store, stealing several items but leaving without their primary target — a Bitcoin ATM.
According to the reporter, they were unsuccessful because ‘Bitcoin is a digital currency, so there’s no actual money inside of those machines’.
Depending on the type of ATM, this may actually be true, as some operate more like portable crypto exchanges than a money giverer-outerer.
Things get just as hectic in Houston, too.
Verdict: Worst Thieves Ever?
As much as I would love to give my stamp of approval, unfortunately, the now-viral Bitcoin ATM thieves weren’t even close to pulling off the worst heist ever.
Admittedly, the attack on BitKing’s ATM was ultimately fruitless. But the popularity of targeting Bitcoin machines shows they weren’t quite as incompetent as social media would have you believe.
When you consider that prime-time ATMs can rake in $30k worth of deposits every month, it’s no wonder people are smashing utes into stores and risking jail time to ‘try and get the coins out’.
But hey, don’t let the truth stop you from sharing the memes online. All publicity is good publicity, right?
Author
Ben Knight
Ben Knight is a writer and editor from Melbourne with a passion for all things music and finance. He enjoys turning complex topics – especially the technical details of cryptocurrency – into digestible bites that anybody can understand. He acquired his Master’s in Writing, Editing and Publishing from RMIT in 2019 and has run his own creative writing business ever since.